
Welcome to my page!
Hi! I’m a multidisciplinary artist with a mission to be at the forefront of contemporary culture and to challenge the status quo!
About
Mildonski is a Lithuanian-born artist based in London. A graduate of Goldsmiths, University of London, she has exhibited in UK and sold works internationally .Mildonski, the name under which Chéz Milda creates was born into the world of art. “I don't make art because I want to. I make it because I have to. It's the way I process what I don't yet understand. It's how I move forward, how I give shape to the intangible, and how I make sense of this world full of magic.”
Group Exhibitions & Performances
2026 Group Exhibition, ISBA Arts, London, UK
2025 Dancing with the System (Performance), Vilnius, Lithuania
2024 Echoes into the Future (Co-organized Group Exhibition), London, UK
2024 Goldsmiths University Final Degree Show, London, UK
2024 Moments Group Art Show, London, UK
2023 Chicas Malas Collective — Quirky Auction, London, UK
2023 Open Mic Guest, Bodies of Water, Slash Arts Boat Gallery
Residencies & Publication
2024 Salt Studio Residency, Druskininkai, Lithuania
2025 Featured in Druskonis newspaper about artistic practice, Lithuania
2023 Featured in upcoming publication 100 Artists of London: Portraits and interviews by Kai Marks, London, UK
Professsional Experience
2021 Artist Assistant (freelance)
2024 Co-organized and curated independent exhibitions and events in London, UK
2024 Invited participant / guest by 243 Luz Gallery, Marseille, France, attended the art fair alongside the gallery, participating in professional and social events with the gallery team and a represented artist.
2026 Volunteer, Lelija Gallery invigilator
2025 Organizer and Facilitator of independent artist discussion and critique group
2025 Self-published professional art catalogue involving artwork research, archiving and editorial organization.
Education
2020–2024 Goldsmiths University, Fine Art BA, London, UK
2024 Understanding Art, Vilnius Auction House
2025 Lithuanian paintings in XIX century, Vilnius Auction House
2025 Designing Possible Futures, Slow Factory, led by Celine Seeman, online, New York
Work
Blog
So unlovable
2026-09-03
So unlovable, that I’m not even there;
So unlovable, that you don’t care,
You will protect yourself but who is going to protect me;
There’s really no point in this at all, and I would really like to run away just one more time, just like always;And what will I tell them if they find out… what will I tell them when they find out…
My tears will be all cried out, and I will look at them back empty.
Because it’s either all or nothing;There’s that much space onto this earth, and each is carving their own. What is my space on this Earth? Where do I belong and why it takes so long to reach you…My sweet birthday 27 is upcoming and I have no friends or family to celebrate. This year it will be the same like last year, I will cry in a motel room all by myself not even windows there.God is nonetheless kind, and I’m grateful everyday. But why is everything so sharp and edgy I can’t tell. I just want to go to bed and sleep my dream until forever.
If I was a musician instead of a painter
2026-09-03
If I was a musician, instead of a painter, I would tell people something, something that would make them smile. I would tell them that it’s all okay, that actually it doesn’t matter and that it will also pass like everything else has also did. If I was a musician, I would make a music that would make a person cry. I would want their throats to feel that tingly pain, but not for any other reason, rather just to feel. But instead I am a painter, I can paint a flower, mountain or a person scream. Looking at the picture, what can you feel, if I don’t tell you a story? That’s the most annoying part. If it was a music, I would want you to rock&roll to the beat I made, I would want you to feel it in your bones, in your spirit, in your blood. I would want you to spin around the circles, jump and scream and let it all out!
Don’t ask me to change
2026-09-03
I met a lot of cool people in my life, mostly artists or art lovers. Complex, beautiful, smart. A lot of you I don’t see often; and some of you I’ll never see again. Some of you have hurt me, some of you- I have. With some of you I traveled, worked, lived, smoked, danced.With all of you I felt something words can’t describe. It pains me that I can’t bring you all to one room, that you are not my neighbours and we are not in one village.One tribe of of restless, running souls.It pains me that with some I’ll never speak again, for reasons unknown to me.
Was I a bit too much at times? No doubt. I blame my ego and my mental health. I would really like something real this time. Something so pure, so vast, so infinite. Something that was real one thousand years ago and will stay real ten thousand years later.Don’t ask me to change.Just talk to me.
What does it mean to understand subconsciously that they are trying to kill us?
2026-09-03
Honestly, there are some places or venues you find yourself in that you are forced to behave one way or another. You are presented with choices but choosing either is like choosing a red apple or a green apple, kind of different but really, kind of the same.Sometimes it really does feel like being a cow just among other cows. Like in the airport or a music festival.
A cow that has gotta get milked and squeezed every cent out of. It’s all about money.Sometimes you are lucky and you find a place with delicious food. You are presented with a few good options and they are all delicious, cheesy, saucy, mouth watering. And then you think was this place created by a family that wanted to share the love for food or was it a person with a business idea that wanted to have a 90% chance of success rate. Because that is two different deliciousness- the kind of delicious you would like your children to be fed and the kind of delicious you would like your enemies to eat until they are addicted and obese.Daily you are forced to see ads that get into your subconscious mind. Daily you’re influenced not just by the images, but by the questions themselves- would you like to get this? It’s a very good deal. If you buy 2, the third is free. Everyone is doing it, when are you gonna do it? Do you want some perfume on the plane? No, I absolutely do not, I never will and I don’t like how you force your products that nobody wants nor on earth nor on sky!
You are influenced by absolutely everything, because EVERYTHING matters. The colours, the textures, the tone, the hairstyle, the smell, other people’s choices being visible to others, or sometimes just the vibes.Since everything is so international, &mixed in, I challenge you to go outside and do your own research on this.
A moment
2026-09-03
Sometimes it’s easier to say than to paint and sometimes it’s easier to paint than to say. Regardless, I will say things as they are this very moment: my head still feels in the sea, I’m still waving with it, even though I am waiting at the bus stop. My tears feel ridiculous, since I was just on one of the most beautiful beaches and my void is just getting louder. I am getting annoyed and triggered easily. I’m tired of paying therapist that hasn’t fixed anything yet. I’m tired of having a friend who when I call says why are you calling me. I’m tired of crying in random places and being so critical of my own body.
What’s the point
2026-09-03
And the other thing I wanted to say was that … I keep thinking what’s the point of it all. Clearly I can’t stop myself, but so what, why am I doing this? What AM I even doing? Creating words, sentences, brushstrokes out of thin air, bridging the unknown into the observable? Although to me it is COOL to create, what’s the point?I think that, it’s definitely not the legacy, since I used to really want it, but then thinking- how badly do I care, since I can’t even remember 10 artists from 17th century. We usually remember the most powerful ones, the richest, the most cruel, the queens and the emperors. The artist’s purpose I now think, is to help the public, the audience, the majority to simply get by, to be understood, to feel; I say that, because that’s what music does to me. Although I would never become a musician, I believe that visual art does that to people in its own way.
But also, since you’re doing such a massive favour to the world that lives on autopilot, consumes the never ending, the artist deserves a good life too. To be a suicidal artist- whether through a short term thinking (unhealthy habits) or an impulse is quite a classic way to go and I just think that although this earth consistently has angels falling from the sky into the gates of hell, one shall realise to be a peaceful warrior instead of a fallen angel.
Sometimes it’s not up to us…
The price
2026-09-03
Art is kind of annoying me nowadays. You can sort of look at life through patterns and recognise that art fits in to the pattern just as fine.The real art so to say is so painful in this capitalistic machine. The machine,that sells you mugs, tshirts and posters with this same “art”.The real art is so painful and you could say almost dangerous not just to the “power” but also to Life itself, to You.To make art is to not build a business, it’s to not sit in the sun, it’s to not socialise, it’s to not have an adventure, it’s to not run after the money. The money- the oxygen of the capitalism.And what for? So that some show-off that wants to be swag in a hundred years has your art in their volt to perhaps avoid taxes but maybe they also like the painting’s colours next to their couch.Is that what we do nowadays? Spend our youth trying to prove, improve, impress, surprise, shock, stay in the studio entire year, so that someone else’s ego gets to be stroked in a hundred years when they collect your Cool work after you die?And at the same time, simultaneously and paradoxically, to be an artist as a choice of being is ridiculous and selfish also.Because everything comes down to an identity and ego.Not saying you shouldn’t be an artist, not saying you should stop making work, not saying being selfish is inherently bad.But that’s my observation and thoughts.The only way I could possibly justify being an artist is that it’s a way of becoming. Becoming what, I don’t know. Perhaps Yourself. But the price of it is ridiculous.
MY home
2026-09-03
You used to live here, I used to walk this road, I used to listen to the music I listen to now, the same road I call MY home.You told me many sweet words and whilst that was NICE,
“Nice” is no longer sufficient, it’s no longer enough.I walk the same road now, which I call my home, the same road I used to walk on my way to yours.
Out of the station, cross the road, turn to the left, and walk straight till the end.
Who to call?
2026-09-03
Who do you call, when the one you usually call to, is playing games?
Who should I call now that I’m all by myself….
Whom should I say about all the bad things that have happened?
Whom should I cry on a shoulder….
I could try calling him, her, her or him, but will they understand?It’s okay to cry sometimes;
Half empty train, wrong line, have to get back and go right again;
this time-home.Her laugh is contagious and the simple warmth of the house is enough to make me forget of the worries.He didn’t text back, cause he had nothing to say. Nothing to say because he knew he made a mistake.
Will he apologise for once in his life or let his ego ride the tide?
Still drowning, too proud to decide.
Chicago
2026-09-03
“Ah what a poor man… he wrote his whole life and only at the end of it realised he was not a writer. What an irony of life.” A discussion between two old Lithuanian friends in Chicago, whilst on a coffee meet up. But he tried, I thought. At least he gave a shot.*****I love Chicago. I love it I love it I love it. I love how there’s not that many people here, I love how spacious it is, I love how massive and gorgeous it is.
New York
2026-09-03
Americans, New Yorkers, it’s a different kind of breed of humans. So much character, so much drama, so much culture!!!!
The memories of tonight are memories worth writing. “Ohhhh look at that! What a cunty tattoo!” A drag queen shouts looking at my tattoo. “Can I take a picture ????”…
Whatever the freedom means to people, you will find it here. Whatever freedom is to you, you might even find a New Yorker within yourself. The land of free. Apparently.Do whatever you want. Let your mind explore.I hate cubism. And I love colourful squares, especially Mark Rothko’s. They bring me so much peace. A familiar feeling of home. But not the one you’ve born in, but the one you’re making for yourself. Really, the goosebumps are going through my entire body.*****Make something shitty today. That’s what he said. That’s what she said (first). Fine.
I don’t want to paint. I don’t want to write. For what? For who? For myself? For myself I am fine, and others… well maybe for others…
What do you want me to paint? A portrait? A body? Probably woman’s right? Or something abstract and meaningless? I am angry because I’m blaming it on war, but who knows, I might be the problem. I might lack the focus or inspiration…
Everything seems to have lost its value. To disassociate and to forget- I can do that by consuming. Content, food or entertainment. Those are enough to keep you alive just on the surface level. And to really feel, deeply, attach yourself to something else seems to be too dangerous.
Today’s art makes me say: what the fuck did I just see. What is that? Why am I looking at it? Why did they spend time making it? Installing it? Just for me to question it? Are they making fun of the viewer? If they do, I applaud. But I personally need more.
This even makes me question my life. This trip was for art. This is so that I get immersed in “the art capital”.
I got so many invitations by the “Universe” through people, to this place. But why do I feel called back home to London? Am I that loyal? Or am I too European?
Berlin
2026-09-03
Ahh would be nice to call somebody. Would be nice if somebody called me. I realised that to be useful is a good thing.
Were humans even meant to live this long? I was told now many times about the bad things happen everyday to people. So am grateful to be still alive, even at the humble quarter of my life.
They say “move from your comfort zone and try somewhere new”. Then why am I coming back to Berlin third year in a row? Perhaps cause I’m seeking depth. I’m seeking to build a relationship with the place, not only people. And if you like something, perhaps you should enjoy it? What did I learn from Berlin the first time I was in? It was that moving with the flow and the wind is the best planner you could ever ask for. It matches your energy levels and being able to take the decision there and then gives you exactly what you need in the moment. The second time I was in Berlin I learned that for the sponge to take water in, you need to squeeze it out first. It’s a metaphor I’ve learned from a dr and a researcher who was in her free time, helping travellers to find the answers from within. The metaphor meant that, in order to take in new experiences, you need to make space for them by reflecting, responding or creating. Such way, you let the creative energy into a constructive project. The third time I was in Berlin, I’ve learned that the rare opportunities can go as fast as they appeared. And if you really feel special way about one, take it. Take it fast without hesitation or postponing. Also, learned that taking street drugs might not be the best idea.
Hey Stranger
2026-09-03
Hey stranger,
Sorry for not saying hi,
You wanted connection and
Of all the worst, I ignored.Don’t be upset, stranger,
Now I think of you.
Most importantly, you were kinda hot,
But my glasses were on my head,
And I couldn’t see your eyes, it was all so fast, so it was easier to ignore.Dear stranger, you probably have already forgotten, but I have not.
Please forgive me and move on.
Now I must move on too, because time has passed and the train has gone.
But I’m sorry, and I hope you’re good.
The mountains
2026-09-03
If I told you what I’m doing, maybe you’d say “wow that’s so impressive! You’re so driven! So passionate!”. But what if I told you, it only looks good on paper? That the pain and emptiness doesn’t go away? Always there, lingering. Surely, when you find yourself in an environment so clean of the nonsense, environment filled with beautiful things, beautiful looking people, clothes, jewellery, food, relaxed faces, you forget your pain for a while. The curated real life aesthetics are so stimulating it works almost as good as looking at the view of the mountains. I talk to God and God talks to me. I listen. They listen too. It’s not easy to understand the signs always and I think God is laughing about it. Having all the possible power and Mildonski still don’t get it. That’s why God is more blunt to her when necessary.
Never at rest
2026-09-03
My heart rate’s increased. The new wave is coming and it’s bigger than ever. I ended this call, that may as well could’ve not have happened. I’m leaving the keys and closing the doors. It’s time for me to go. The lingering moment, this blissful in-between but also nowhere moment, is where my heart feels most at rest. Being nomadic, never still, never at rest, never settled.
The Revolution
2026-09-03
People did it again. They revolted against the system. This time- the government was scared for their lives.
People made it. Now, when there was no ruler, they decided to be open for a change. They changed the system entirely eradicating all the ISMs: colonialism, nationalism, classism, colonialism, sexism etc.
The white male was no longer positioned as the default beneficiary on the system. Women came to power.
Now all countries are ruled by women and nonbinary. It’s a was the beginning of a flourishing society…
Power of AI
2026-09-03
People started getting their shit together. They realized the power within themselves, but more so within the community. They realized that humans are like ants. One by one, they will reach the goal they dream of. Ai helps them to achieve human freedom and prosperity. They learn to use this advanced tool just as they did with other tools of the past- writing, photography, computers. Although AI has made us question- who are we really, it has also made us stronger than ever. We finally became closer to our humanity as we learned to use this tool.
Give me more
2026-08-20
What I really long for is for you to give me more;
Give me more attention, give me more problems, give me some stress, give me something to care about!
Then tell me how sorry you were, tell me you will change.
Do that mistake, make a fool of yourself in front of me.
There are famous people telling you to give me breadcrumbs, but if you gave me a whole bread, do you think I’d miss that in this pool of piss?
Energy is reciprocated and with you it only works when I run away.
You love it when I’m gone, that’s when you love me.
Give me those stupid roses, even if I don’t really care.
Watch me, when you shouldn’t. Be with me, when I am by myself.
All those times I acted, like I didn’t like it…
4 months you were gone, 4 months you were always there. One day I finally got rid of you, and that’s the day you chose to be back.
No one will truly understand me, but if I write this to myself, it means it hit the target.
Three paces right, three paces up, sunglasses and a cigarette.
Shop
UPCOMING: Mildonski’s Signature Accessories Memorabilia

Bunny Ears
£666 Unique (1/1)

Phone Case
£667 Exclusive (1/1)

White Gloves
£669 Authentic (1/1)
Phone Case
£667 Exclusive (1/1)
Once sold out, never reproduced
White Gloves
£669 Authentic (1/1)
Once sold out, never reproduced
1st World Bloom 1 Edition
£175 Unique Limited Edition (1/50)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Bloom 2 Edition
£175 Unique Limited Edition (1/50)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Bloom 3 Edition
£175 Unique Limited Edition (1/50)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.
1st World Entry Edition
£65 Limited Edition (1/100)
Once sold out, this edition will never be reprinted.







































































